When we first meet someone, whether in person or online, we often form instant judgments about their personality. Research suggests that these initial or first impressions can be surprisingly accurate, even when based on just a few seconds of interaction or a single photo. In one study, individuals introduced themselves in just 7.4 seconds, and observers’ ratings of their extroversion levels correlated significantly with the individuals’ self-reported extroversion. Similarly, online profiles and photos can also reveal personality traits, with some studies showing that participants can determine traits like extroversion and self-esteem with remarkable accuracy.
Several factors can influence your first impression of someone, including their body language, physical features, clothes, the way they wear their hair, accessories, accent, voice, manner of talking, and of course, the way they interact with their immediate environment. But these are all observable attributes. It takes a while to know personality traits that communicate someone’s true nature — compassion, patience, sincerity, humility, or good humor, just to name a few.
What this means is, physical appearance shouldn’t really matter. yet, it does. A great deal in fact.
So while some traits, like extroversion, are easier to detect initially, others like emotional stability may require more context. However, even in situations where individuals are forced to make quick judgments, the accuracy of their appraisals remains impressive. This phenomenon, known as “thin slices,” explains why employment interviews often rely on first impressions. Research shows that interviewers make up their minds about candidates within two minutes of meeting them, and while this may not be ideal, it highlights the validity of initial judgments. By the way, women tend to make these snap judgments as well, and on most occasions, do not change their minds.
In relationships, recognizing the accuracy of first impressions can be both helpful and cautionary. On one hand, it suggests that our instincts may be more reliable than we think. On the other hand, it’s essential to remember that there’s always more to someone than what initially meets the eye. By acknowledging the accuracy of first impressions, we can approach relationships with a more open and informed mindset. We may also be less likely to idealize our partner or overlook potential red flags. Instead, we can focus on getting to know them on a deeper level, flaws and all.
But how then do we ensure we make a solid first impression when we finally meet a person we’re genuinely interested in? It may sound fraudulent, but meeting a person for the first time is probably not the time to “be yourself”. While we want a quality shirt that will still look good wrinkled, we’re not likely to buy a ruffled shirt in a shop window, put there to prove its durability. No. You want to look your best when “selling” yourself. You want to signal only your best qualities, and then slowly reveal yourself over time, giving the other party the chance to see all of you, and then decide what they can or cannot deal with.
For this reason, therefore, we will look at ways to ensure we make a good first impression every time:
1. Stay conscious of body language. Eye contact is a good start.
2. Expressing interest and enthusiasm.
3. Smile. Keep facial expressions positive and confident.
4. Groom. This cannot be overstated!
5. Mind your language. Ladies and gentlemen only, please.
6. Chat confidently. The more you know, the smarter you appear. IQ is attractive!
7. Do not be too opinionated. about anything actually.
8. Be empathetic
You mustn’t do all of the above every time you interact with someone. Some people feel uncomfortable holding a gaze. It actually takes practice to hold eye contact effectively. But you must dress well and look good. yes, at all times outside your house. Doesn’t mean spending a fortune on designer clothes, but a clean look, the right accessories, manicured hands, and a great fragrance will go a long way in making a good first impression.
Remember, a first impression is exactly that. The first point of contact. It’s the beginning. So we should use it as a starting point for further exploration and discovery. By balancing our initial instincts with a willingness to learn more, we can foster deeper connections and more meaningful relationships.
So, the next time you meet someone new, trust your instincts, but also keep in mind that there’s always more to discover. Bad second impressions have been known to kill great first impressions.
