Efficiency or OCD?
Dating a developer
1. Speak Their Language
Learn the lingo: They will inadvertently bounce ideas off you from time to time. So learn some of their more common terminologies like “API,” “stack overflow,” and “syntax error.”
Use coding analogies: When there’s a conflict, compare your relationship to a well-structured code for example – where everything works seamlessly. The more logical your argument, the more likely you are to get through to a developer. No, they may not think only in black and white, but their grey spectrum is probably narrower than most.
2. Be Patient and Supportive
Understand their focus: Developers get quickly and easily sucked into their work. Be patient and supportive when they’re focused. They’ll come up for air. Eventually. SO just be there for them when they do.
Celebrate their wins: Share in their excitement when they solve a complex coding problem. So what if you haven’t got a clue what they’re going on about? Just genuinely enjoy their happiness and breakthroughs.
3. Show Interest
Ask questions: Real genuine questions. Not benign run of the mill, I’ve done my duty type questions. Show genuine curiosity about their projects and the technology they use. In other words, affirm and re-affirm them and their work. It can be a lonely world so every little helps.
4. Share Your Interests
Find common ground: developers like pizza too. They watch football. Well, some of them do. And being an introvert isn’t the same as being insensitive. If anything, it’s quite the opposite. So go ahead and discuss your hobbies and passions and connect with them on a deeper level.
Real-Life Implications:
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Be prepared for constructive criticism
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Develop patience for their problem-solving processes
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Appreciate their creative solutions
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Learn to laugh at their nerdy jokes
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Respect their love for efficiency
Ultimately, the key to dating a developer is patiently understanding their world and showing genuine interest in their passions. They are quirky, well, they can be. It’s the nature of the beast. But they can be fiercely loyal as well, having much less time or desire for social engagements where most couple’s issues emanate. So, support their endeavors, laugh at their nerdy jokes, watch documentary after documentary on Netflix with them, and you’ll be well on your way to building a lasting and fulfilling relationship.