Like Singleton whiskey, will age be quite so kind to the average lifelong single?
Why do some people thrive as lifelong singles while others pursue relationships at every turn? Are some people simply born to be single and others tailormade for long-term unions? After all, it doesn’t matter how hard some people try, they will never be expert or even good swimmers. So are there certain traits that indicate if a person will be a lifelong single or not? Rather like the way a lithe frame might suggest success in the pool or on the dancefloor.
Well, as it turns out, yes, there just might be. Recent research sheds light on the personality traits that set lifelong singles apart. Interestingly, the research also suggests that the path of the ‘singleton” isn’t all about loneliness or lack of opportunity, as is commonly thought. Their path is actually often rooted in personality.
The study we will reference, published in Frontiers in Psychology, used data from over 3,000 adults to explore how personality traits differ between those who remain single and those in long-term relationships, and here’s what the science uncovered about lifelong singles and the unique qualities that define them.
1. More Open to New Experiences
Singles tend to score slightly higher on openness to experience, that’s the “O” in the Big Five personality traits – OCEAN. This means they’re curious, creative, and eager to embrace novelty—qualities that make their single lives dynamic and fulfilling.
Whether it’s traveling solo, learning a new skill, or stepping out of their comfort zones, lifelong singles often channel their adventurous spirits into self-growth and exploration.
2. They’re Very Independent
Lifelong singles often display a strong sense of self-reliance. According to the study, our lifelong singles score lower on traits associated with dependence, making them less likely to rely on others for decision-making or validation.
This independence allows them to build lives that reflect their own values, free from societal expectations to couple up.
3. Singles Tend to Be Less Agreeable
Here’s an interesting twist: lifelong singles generally score lower on agreeableness, a trait associated with prioritizing others’ needs and maintaining harmony.
This doesn’t mean singles are unfriendly—it reflects their tendency to prioritize autonomy and set boundaries. They’re less likely to compromise their independence or alter their lifestyle for the sake of a partner, a quality that aligns with their choice to remain single.
4. More Emotional Stability
Contrary to stereotypes about single life being stressful or lonely, the research reveals that lifelong singles often exhibit high levels of emotional stability.
Singles are less prone to emotional highs and lows and tend to handle stress well, suggesting that they’ve developed strong internal coping mechanisms. This emotional resilience might explain why many singles feel fulfilled and content without a long-term romantic partner.
5. Self-Sufficient Problem-Solvers
Staying single often fosters self-sufficiency, and the data supports this idea. Lifelong singles tend to embrace challenges head-on, relying on their problem-solving skills to navigate life without leaning heavily on a partner.
This trait not only builds confidence but also helps them thrive in areas like work, hobbies, and friendships, creating a well-rounded and satisfying life.
6. They Have Diverse Social Circles
Taking us further away from the stereotype that singletons are lonely, several studies including this one, show that lifelong singles cultivate strong social connections outside of romantic relationships. Maybe we can interpret this to mean “instead of romantic relationships”.
Instead of focusing all their emotional energy on a partner, they spread it across a network of close friends, family, and colleagues. This creates a sense of community that rivals, and sometimes surpasses, traditional relationship dynamics.
7. Singles Have Unique Priorities
Singles often focus on individual goals that aren’t tied to traditional relationship milestones. From excelling in their careers to pursuing creative passions, lifelong singles tend to have clear priorities that don’t revolve around finding a partner.
This clarity of purpose is a driving force in their lives, allowing them to build a future that aligns with their values and aspirations.
What the Numbers Say About Singlehood
- About 3 in 10 adults in the U.S. are single, with many thriving emotionally and socially.
- The study found singles scored higher on openness to experience and lower on agreeableness compared to those in relationships.
- Singles often reported a stronger sense of independence and greater emotional stability than their coupled counterparts.
These findings challenge traditional assumptions that equate singlehood with loneliness or incompleteness. Instead, they show that lifelong singles often lead rich, fulfilling lives rooted in autonomy, connection, and self-discovery.
End of The Road
“Single guys clap your hands…” That’s from the classic from the 80’s band Cameo, celebrating the single life. But like an ageing rock star, apologies to Larry Blackmon and co, what becomes of the singleton as age creeps up? Unlike Singleton the whiskey, age is not so kind to the average single. And with all the best efforts in the world, a dip in energy usually means a dip in socializing.
Is loneliness therefore the ultimate destination for our hard-fighting, nonconformist singles?
Might having children, albeit outside wedlock, help? Seems there’s more research to carry out before we declare singledom a happy place in the long run.
