When it comes to dating, we’ve all been there, swimming frantically in the vast ocean also known as the dating scene. It’s the time spent on the phone in the middle of the night, or more recently, swiping through apps, wave after wave. Yet, at the end of the day, you may still wind up solo on Lonely Island. For some, it’s about casting their nets wide and hoping for the best, while others cast their fishing rods, knowing roughly what they might catch. Ultimately, it all boils down to the same hopeful endpoint – wondering if we’ll ever find “the one”.
For a peculiar few of course, it’s about finding the ones. As many fish as they can (or cannot) possibly handle. The serial daters need not continue at this point. For the “happily ever after hopefuls”, let us continue. As it turns out, there might be a way to increase your chances of finding a compatible partner. That ‘way’ might just be in the understanding and application of the Big Five personality traits, a psychological framework that can help you know you better, and know with a fair degree of certainty, how to predict your dating success.
What are the Big Five Personality Traits?
The Big Five, also known as the Five Factor Model (FFM), are the five broad dimensions of personality that shape our behavior, thoughts, and feelings. By definition, therefore, it is possible that you might be able to predict your dating success if you know what to look out for in the endless sea of hopefuls:
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Openness to Experience: Are you an adventurous thrill-seeker or a cozy homebody? Would you swim the stormy seas seeking a challenge or even sail a calm ocean, just to know what it’s like?
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Conscientiousness: Are you a planner or a procrastinator? Do you prioritize organization and efficiency or prefer to ride the waves, and see where the tides take you?
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Extraversion: Are you a social butterfly or a “staying home to watch TV” type? Do you know all the new songs and dance moves? Or are you ok doing an easy shuffle to the latest songs?
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Agreeableness: Are you a people-pleaser or a bit of a rebel? Are you mostly the storm waiting to happen, or you’re typically the gentle breeze, regardless of the provocation?
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Neuroticism: Are you a worrier or a chill pill? Do you experience anxiety and stress frequently or have a more relaxed beachside approach to life?
If you’re wondering what all the sea and ocean references are about, it’s because the big 5 make up the acronym OCEAN. And if you didn’t notice, that’s fine too. We move.
How Do the Big Five Impact Your Dating Life?
Research suggests that the Big Five personality traits can influence your dating prospects in significant ways. Here’s what your score might reveal:
Extraversion:
If you’re an extrovert, you might be more likely to attract potential partners, but beware of coming on too strong! Your outgoing nature can be attractive, but make sure to listen and show interest in your partner’s life too. If you’re an introvert, don’t worry – your thoughtful nature can be a major turn-on. Just be sure to speak up and assert yourself in the relationship. Remember, introversion is not the same as shyness. it’s not the same as modesty either, though both can and do have their appeals.
Agreeableness:
If you’re high in agreeableness, you might be more likely to attract a partner who values harmony and cooperation. This can be a great asset in a relationship, but remember to speak up for yourself and assert your needs too. If you’re low in agreeableness, don’t worry – your independence and confidence can be attractive to someone who values a strong partner. But try to temper your reactions a little. Ultimately, peace reigns over almost any other desirable outcome in a partnership.
Conscientiousness:
If you’re conscientious, you might be more likely to attract someone who values stability and reliability. This can be a great foundation for a long-term relationship but remember to have a little fun along the way. Conscientious people can be “steevos”, aka, boring. A partnership must have some fun and excitement. Otherwise, the non-steevo partner may be forced to seek their thrills elsewhere. On the other hand, if you’re low in conscientiousness, don’t worry – your carefree nature can be attractive to someone who values adventure and flexibility.
Neuroticism:
If you’re high in neuroticism, you might be more prone to anxiety and stress in relationships. This can be challenging, but remember that a supportive partner can help you work through your worries…, if and only if you let them! Identify this trait and accept it. That way, you can address the issues which trigger you, and go on to live a fulfilling life with a special person. If you’re low in neuroticism, don’t worry – your relaxed approach to life can be attractive to someone who values calm and stability.
Openness to Experience:
If you’re open to experience, you might be more likely to attract someone who shares your love of adventure and trying new things. This can be a great asset in a relationship, but remember to focus on your partner’s needs and desires too. If you’re low in openness to experience, it’s fine – your loyalty and commitment can be the perfect yin to your adventurous partner’s yang.
So, What’s Your Big Five Score?
Take the test and find out! Your results might surprise you, and who knows – you might just discover that you can indeed predict your dating success. Remember, the Big Five personality traits are just one aspect of who you are, and relationships are complex and multifaceted. But by understanding your personality and preferences, you can increase your chances of finding a compatible partner and building a fulfilling relationship.
The Horizon
The Big Five personality traits can offer valuable insights into your dating prospects. But remember – no one is perfect, and relationships are all about growth and compromise. So, don’t be too hard on yourself if you don’t tick every box – just be your amazing self, and the right person will come along! By understanding your personality and preferences, you can predict your dating success, and build a fulfilling relationship. So, take the test, learn more about yourself, and get out there and start dating!
